okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Randomize
