I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Randomize