i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
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did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I distinctly remember holding up a piece of ham pizza and screaming: "WHO THE FUCK EATS HAM PIZZA" in the face of a bunch of scared 13 year old girls faces, while my own sister laughed in mine.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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