some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!