I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
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