I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
Her vagina was like a man-sized safe.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
