OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Dicks are not precious.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
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