I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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