hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Randomize
