I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Randomize
