its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
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