Well douche your snatch and let's go!
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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