I heard we made out
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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