Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
