Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
Randomize
