So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
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I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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