another moral hangover. fuck.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
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