why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
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