I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
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We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
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I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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