so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Randomize
