i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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