ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
it's a shame restraining orders have to come between me and my relationships
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Randomize