i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
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