your thong is hanging out like whoa
So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Randomize
