Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
