turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
You couldn't find any paper towel to clean up the wine you spilled, so you tried to use her cat.
ooh i remember now. Not very absorbent.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
You crawled through a doggy door 5 times for a shot if cheap vodka.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
