i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
Randomize
