dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
How do I say “I have great tits” without it sounding awful
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
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