I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize
