the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
don't judge my taste in strippers
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize