I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Im pretty sure that girl just said "Im taking you home even if your girlfriend has to come too." Why are we here again?
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
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