Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
