What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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