someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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