Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
The ass gains better be worth it
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