So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
I could make wine with my vomit
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
he drank half a bottle of bushmills, stood up to pee over the side, pissed his pants, sat in the puddle on the deck, told me my life goals were stupid and impossible, and wouldn't leave until 5am. by the time I got up at 8 I had 4 texts and 2 fb messages from him. AND HE STILL THINKS IT WENT WELL
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
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