I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
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