i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
The baby slept soo good last night. Its like he knows the importance of me being intoxicated all weekend.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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