Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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