She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Randomize
