Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.