So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
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