Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
You know your life has gone off the rails when waking up in a Spanish hospital with alcohol poisoning and no memory of how you got there is not even your top wildest drinking story.
Randomize
