I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize