Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
