well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
Randomize
