all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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