i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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