dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe he injected his testicle?
All he gave me was a sore vagina and film suggestions
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Randomize