i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
