So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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