S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
